My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Randomize
