your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
