I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize