And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
