WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
