have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize