Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Randomize