Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
being pregnant is like rehab
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
