My hand turned me down
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Are these your boobs on my camera?
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize