Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Randomize
