She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
