I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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