Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Randomize
