Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
