You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
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