Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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