so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
