nut hugger
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize
