So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Just invented taco cereal.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize
