i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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