So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
and she was petting her beer can
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
