It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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