4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
