I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Randomize
