so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize
