I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize