between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Randomize
