Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
It's blow job season.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Randomize
