The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
I need to calm my uterus...
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
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