I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
pop tarts are not kleenex
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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