it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize
