I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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