In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
