i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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