bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Randomize
