he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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