I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
