yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
so explain again why im purple
no
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Randomize
