Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
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