She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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