If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Randomize
