But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
