Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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