White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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