PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
