it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Randomize
