You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
Randomize
