So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Randomize