so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
