Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Randomize
