i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Randomize
